The Ellen Degeneres Show

I went yesterday, it airs today! here are some pics!


And this is George Clooney's Office!

johncmayer

I feel totally bummed for some reason, and I hate it...

I have been listening to some John Mayer. His music is soooo soulful, it makes me feel a little better, and also a little sad at the same time. But I love it! John Mayer is the perfect guy. He sings and writes beautiful songs, and he is hilarious! His sarcasm is never dull and he just seems so real. I love him!

"Can't seem to hold you like I want to
So I can feel you in my arms
Nobody's gonna come and save you
We pulled too many false alarms

I was the one you always dreamed of
You were the one I tried to draw
How dare you say it's nothing to me
Baby, you're the only light I ever saw

I'll make the most of all the sadness
You'll be a bitch because you can
You try to hit me just to hurt me
So you leave me feeling dirty
Because you can't understand"

So here I am, home on a Saturday night!! Its been a while!! I’m NEVER home on the weekends!! Its weird! And I’m bored!!! Idk what to do!! Myspace can only entertain me for so long, ughhhh.

Anyway I’m better now! I’m getting over IT lol. Yay me! And it was all thanks to alcohol lol



anyway, I've been reading New Moon, (I've heard the audio books, never read them) and I must say, I AM ON TEAM JACOB!!!! I love Taylor Launter, he is waaaay hotter than rob pattinson!!!

my dilemna

I like to consider myself to be a very understanding person. I am very forgiving, sometimes too forgiving, but I like to think I am genuinely opened minded.

However, I think I reached my final straw. Some stuff happened to me (boy drama of course!) and I feel like I really cant get over it. They both say, “its not a big deal”, but to me it is!!! Why cant they see that?!!? Obviously they aren’t the ones getting hurt!

Every time a fried is having a hard time, people tend to say, “oh I know how you feel, that sucks”, but NO you don’t know how I feel!!! Its my feelings! My heart and mind, and NO I wont get over it until I’m ready!!

It’s semi true what they say however, “time heals everything… I say semi for the reason that people never fully get over it, they just learn to cope and deal with it while not being in their head 24/7. With this I say, I’ll learn to deal with my problem, and in my own personal way, I’ll be able to look at them in the eye.

Anyway, I’m all cried out! I think about it now and I think I got my closure with both of them.

Goodnight!

Resentment

"Resentment or grudges do no harm to the person against whom you hold these feelings but every day and every night of your life, they are eating at you." -Norman Vincent Peale

Its true. You can totally still go on through life and people feeling resentful.. I resent a lot of things and people that have done something to me. I can go with a straight face and be cool with them, but deep down inside I'm so damn full of resentment. Some things I can forgive, but never forget. I hate having this feeling towards a person, but its just how I feel. I've been hurt one too many times and I cant help but hold a grudge. I hate it, don't get me wrong, but I keep it inside because I don't like to fight with these people. I am the type of person that just wants to be cool with everyone....

Its memorial day weekend!! yay!

its been a good weekend and last night my friends and I gossiped about celebrities. lol. We've never ever done that! and I'm glad to say that my addiction to TMZ and perezhilton.com paid off! yay me!!

Well, I've been a mix of emotions and unfortunately I've been drowning myself in sorrows lately and drinking.... ughh. Lame, I know. But I was hit with some really bad news yesterday and I'm really bummed.... slapped in the face really.... I just want things to go back wayyyy back to how it was....

Swiping the table clean

So these past couple of days have been uummm well weird lol. Its just a surprise how old friends are suddenly back in my life. These people are not the type of "friends" that were there for a bit, they are the kind that I have known for years! It's just weird how its all happening right now. I mean, I am happy about it, it just seems surreal to me to have everyone there...

There is one that still makes me nervous of the thought of hanging out with them... just cuz it hurt so much to let go of them. It was a process for us. I could not just come back and smile about everything that happened. It was endless conversations and paragraphs of emails and texts... but im glad im ok with that person. Its like we swiped the table clean and started over :)